Adolescence

When we grow up….

It’s a very common notion among the general mass of people that adolescence is period when a child needs most of the protection; Protection from the luring of evil traps that teenagers commonly fall prey to. It’s not only these traps that pose a certain amount of danger to the growing people but also other more intriguing aspects such as peer pressure, and the urge to stand out from the crowd. There are various discussions that say that teenagers often get confused about the status they belong to. In a sudden spur of hormones and brain development, they tend to get carried away with the mass. In Indian context it has been observed that there is significant level of drug abuse among the youth aged between 17-20. Most of the people often blame the child’s upbringing in their family but most people often miss the fact that drug abuse is more often than not related to various external factors like poverty, malnutrition and population explosion. The urban people though have a different mentality about drug abuse. They believe that certain things are necessary to be indulged so that they are accepted in a certain group. That is where intervention is required by parents or counselors. The general biology during these time period is about the brain development that takes place during these growing years which is the development of the prefrontal cortex. The prefrontal cortex is more involved in planning, decision making, and reasoning. The variation in maturity that we observe among individuals is mainly due to the degree of variation in the development of this part of the brain.

In a research carried out by a sociologist in Canada stated that, 85 % of the people in their adolescence and early adulthood trust their peers and friends for emotional support and not on their parents whereas the scenario is different in India where studies reveal that youths believe that parents have their child’s best interest in mind. Another factor governing the fact that modern parents complain about their child is they turning rebellious and disobedient during the growing years. It could be partially blamed on the fact that Indian parents tend to be often over protective about their child which can create an aura of desperation among the child. Frankly, no one would like to be embarrassed in front of their friends when a simple young boy says no to attend a slumber party or a sleepover at a friend’s home. The brittle trust issue between the parent and the child is often exposed in this case. This is contradictory to the scenario that we know is prevalent in the west. Parents there are more encouraging and often are frank about discussions about drugs or alcoholism at an early age.  Thus the child also feels comfortable about sharing certain experiences and the mistakes they commit and can also learn from it quickly. In India, matters on similar topics are often not discussed with their child at the right age, as a result of which people generate wrong conceptions about sensitive issues like alcoholism and sexuality. After the recent declaration by the US Supreme Court on same sex marriages being legalized in US, a common troll post went viral all over facebook which said that in India boys still always can’t marry the girl of their choice. The irony in this statement is quite deep and brings up issues like caste and differences among the various classes of society.

Another common problem among Indian youth is the fact that they judge people a lot based on the factors which are more materialistic often missing out the simple fact of life that these things only matter till a certain point. It is often said by NRIs that, there is no differentiation among people in the based on the clothes they were which do not mean that people should have wrong dress sense for certain occasions but implies that this should be a factor to differentiate among people. After all we all are human beings and are flawed. Blood is red. It all boils down to priorities in life. A person might enjoy hanging out with friends in discos or parties or a person might enjoy the calmness and serenity of a library, it all depends on the person’s mentality and thought process. A person attending a lot of parties may have a brilliant educational background or a person indulging in reading books may fake the entire thing. We can’t judge based on these things.

It is often said, that we can know a person by the friend he or she keeps but this might n not be true always because to know a person completely, to understand the psyche behind their actions or words, sometimes even a lifetime might fall short. We should instead try to built a more value based educational system where moral values are incorporated in a child more rather than focusing on their personal lives or the life they choose to live. Who knows an alcoholic might be a good person too. So let’s take a breath and stop thinking about people from a low point of view. Let’s bring in a sense of equality and hope that the changes are often more accepted and that everything happens for a reason. 

Debanjan Kundu